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| Name: |
HubCap
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| Subject: |
Think Before You Speak
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Date:
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5/8/2012 3:05:30 PM
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Think Before You Speak
I would call this putting your foot in your mouth........
Here are five reasons why you should think before you speak - the last one is great!
Have you ever spoken and wished that you could
immediately take the words back....
Here are the Testimonials of a few people who did....
FIRST
TESTIMONY: I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and asked loudly, 'How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?'
I turned around and walked back out and never went back
My husband didn't say a word..
he knew better.
SECOND
TESTIMONY: I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls... I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using. After browsing for
several minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works at the store. He asked if he could help me.
Without thinking, I looked at him and said, 'I think I like playing with men's balls'
THIRD
TESTIMONY: My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a variety of candy and nuts. As
we were looking at the display case, the boy
behind the counter asked if we needed any help. I replied, 'No, I'm just looking at your nuts.'
My sister started to laugh hysterically.
The boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked
away.. To this day, my sister has never let me forget.
FOURTH
TESTIMONY: Have you ever asked your child a question too many times? My three-year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training and I was on him constantly. One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch, in
between errands it was very busy, with a full dining room. While enjoying my taco, I smelled something funny,
so of course I checked my seven-month-old daughter, she was clean. Then realized that Danny had not asked to go potty in a while. I asked him if he needed to go, and he said 'No'. I kept thinking 'Oh Lord, that child has had an accident, and I don 't have any clothes with me.'
Then I said, 'Danny, are you SURE you didn't have an
accident?'
'No,' he replied.
I just KNEW that he must have had an accident, because the smell was getting worse. Soooooo, I asked one more time, Danny did you have an accident ? This time he jumped up, yanked down his pants,
bent over, spread his cheeks and yelled
'SEE MOM, IT'S JUST FARTS!!' While 30 people nearly choked to death on their tacos laughing,
he calmly pulled up his pants and sat down. An old couple made me feel better, thanking me for the best laugh they'd ever had! LAST BUT NOT LEAST
TESTIMONY: This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days
and a very embarrassed female news anchor who will,
in the future, likely think before she speaks. What happens when you predict snow but don 't get any! We had a female news anchor that, the day after it was
supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman
and asked:
'So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last
night?' Not only did he have to leave the set, but half the crew
did too they were laughing so hard!
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| Name: |
architect
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| Subject: |
True story
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Date:
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5/13/2012 10:42:28 PM (updated 5/13/2012 10:48:46 PM)
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Years ago friends of ours and their 9 or 10 year old son were driving from their home in North Carolina to Florida. They stopped at an ice cream place along the road in South Carolina. The son ordered a hot butterscotch sundae, the lady behind the counter asked "You want sum nuts on dis don't ye?" Yes mam" he says. She then asked "You want me to crush ye nuts?" "NOOO MAM!!" was his reply.
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